Toko Batik: Nous Avons Le Choix

When having lunch in the faculty cafetaria, one of my friends told me about her problem related to her thesis. She told me that everyday she felt so sad, she prayed and read newspaper to get inspiration. Se told me that she was so desperated with that situation. Actually I felt desperate too after hearing her sharing. What made me desperated was that I did not do anything such as pray or read newspaper to get inspiration. Still about the same friend, before taking wudhu in library Mosque, she told me that she felt guilty to the country if she got a bad grade, yeah considering that our recent study is supported by the scholarship from the government. We are free from tuition fee and we can go shopping using monthly grant. Actually I did not really care about her anxiety since I do not have any bad grade.

Because of feeling bored, after having dinner, I decided to go strolling. As usual, I went to the area of Jeron Beteng. Actually I just need fresh air after all of the burden from college. By going around this area, I can get fresh mood without spending any money. However, today I was attracted by my favourite batik shop. I did not know, suddenly I just wanted to stop by as this shop located near the alun-alun utara. I just had limited money in my wallet and this shop doesn't serve payment using card. Then, after choosing two dress, I just could buy one of them since my money was not enough. When going to the exit door, it was closed since it was 9 P.M. haha.. I went home with IDR 5.000 left in my wallet. Then I followed the route of alun-alun utara, then went to alun2 selatan among the crowd of bike full of colourful lamps. Just walking around, then I went home.

Before entering the street of my boarding house, I saw an old man walked with his hand. He couldn't walk, he's difable. Not far from him, there were his dirty stuffs. I think that are his treasure. It was about 9.30 p.m, cold night. That old man struggled with his life. He did not even have any jacket or warm cloth, even may be clean cloth. I don't know whether he has a house or not. If he has, at least he still has to struggle to reach it by walking with his hand. Oh God, what is his job? If he is a tax payer. The money from his tax is the part of my scholarship that I use to shop every month.

Actually I wanted to write about having choices after one class in the 1st semester. My lecturer opened my eyes about why so many people keep going abroad to be migrant labour. It is because they have no choice. Thus, we have to thank God for every choices we have right now. I have many choices, I can study with sufficient condition, I have healthy parents and lil bro, I have perfect body organs, I have future that I can arrange and plan starting from now. Actually that class also opened my eyes when I felt sad in the final struggle in a bus in Jakarta last year. Opened my eyes that in the late at night when I took a bus for going home and taking a rest, a woman stood in that bus with thick make up for going to a club to work as a singer until the morning. She also has a child to feed. How I have many choices. J'ai le choix.

In the same batik shop, about two months ago, after looking my batik style on fb, my friend asked me to buy her several batik dress and sent it. I bought in that shop. It was a day after volcanic eruption. In front of that shop, I saw an old man with his bike containing products he sold passed the dusty street without any shoes or sandals. May be he also doesn't have any choices, even, may be he doesn't have any sandals. And may be he is a tax payer who contributes to pay my scholarship fund.

Considering that I still have many choices, I think I have to aware it. I have to study harder and be useful for environment around me. Not to feel unreasonable sad and blablabla, and struggling harder to reach my dreams.

Following my friend's effort, I'll read many materials to look for the inspiration for my thesis.

Btw, when I have dinner today, I got an information that the parent of this friend is sick in the hospital. Again and a again, I thanks to God that my parents are healthy. See I have many choices and luck. I read in the book that people tend to be so sad despite of everything God give to them. If I'm not mistaken, John Lenon created a phrase related to this: because the sky is blue, it makes me cry. People cry despite of the fact that the day is beautiful with the blue sky.  Then I decide to be happy with all choices I have in my life. Matur sembah nuwun Gusti.